Baby boys, nannies and serial womanizing

This is a troubling story from the UK Telegraph: Baby boys who have a nanny 'turn into womanisers'.

In the book The Unsolicited Gift, Dr Dennis Friedman said delegating child-rearing responsibilities too soon risks equipping your son with life-long double standards when it comes to women. This means that even though he could go on to be married he will always have the feeling that another women could cater for all his basic needs. "It introduces him to the concept of The Other Woman," said Dr Friedman who is 85.

"It creates a division in his mind between the woman he knows to be his natural mother and the woman with whom he has real hands-on relationship: the woman who bathes him and takes him to the park, and with whom he feels completely at one.

More here.

Just another thing to make working moms feel guilty, huh? I think this is bogus. I came from generations(grandpa, uncles, cousins) of proud--and stupid--womanizers and believe me, there weren't any nannies in my late grandpa's day and he still cheated on his wife and managed to father dozens of children from different women outside his marriage. Some in the family believed his serial infidelity drove my poor grandma to an early grave.

But anyway, I believe cheating on your spouse is the lowest of the low no matter who does it... having a nanny while young doesn't cut it because each of us have the power to choose between right and wrong. I saw firsthand the effects of womanizing (abandoned wives and kids, poverty etc.) and anecdotal though this is, I know nannies/caregivers weren't the cause.

My much loved but exasperatingly good-time loving grandpa, uncles, brother,cousins etc. just did not say "no"... and their families suffered for it. And for those Lotharios I'm related to who read this, I love you guys but saying "it runs in the family or "lahi kasi" doesn't cut it either.

*** photo by Getty

Read more...