My sister, the new Aussie

congratulations, newly-minted Aussies!

 My sister Anne has become an Australian. She had her citizenship ceremony recently and as I looked at pictures of her smiling widely, proudly showing off her citizenship certificate and waving a miniature Australian flag, I felt so happy for her but so sad at the same time.

 I'm happy because she's made a good life for herself in a country so different from ours, but sad that this might well mean she won't come back to live here anymore. It's a sad truth that nurses like my sister--and her best friend Cheryl--had to leave the country to make a living elsewhere... they are paid peanuts here, so who can blame them?

there you go...

When my sister left more than a decade ago, we immediately reaped the financial benefits and the balikbayan boxes (oh, the Tim Tams!). Her nursing career took her at first, to Saudi Arabia then to Ireland and finally, Australia. She was able to travel the world, gave our elderly mother (and us too) every little thing she asked (please, nobody tell Mama I called her "elderly"!) and gave help to relatives in need.

The benefits were endless... par for the course for the girl we depended on to get up on the roof to make sure everything were nailed down so the typhoon won't blow our house away (none of her other sisters were brave enough to do it, LOL). She's always been the most daring--the first to leap off the guava tree in our front yard, the first to drive etc.

celebrating at home w/ friends

So now our country's lost another dedicated, hard-working citizen. This happy-but-sad event is duplicated in practically every family I know. It is our nation's present reality and I hope things would get better soon. But for now, the Philippines' loss is Australia's gain, for sure.

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Baby boys, nannies and serial womanizing

This is a troubling story from the UK Telegraph: Baby boys who have a nanny 'turn into womanisers'.

In the book The Unsolicited Gift, Dr Dennis Friedman said delegating child-rearing responsibilities too soon risks equipping your son with life-long double standards when it comes to women. This means that even though he could go on to be married he will always have the feeling that another women could cater for all his basic needs. "It introduces him to the concept of The Other Woman," said Dr Friedman who is 85.

"It creates a division in his mind between the woman he knows to be his natural mother and the woman with whom he has real hands-on relationship: the woman who bathes him and takes him to the park, and with whom he feels completely at one.

More here.

Just another thing to make working moms feel guilty, huh? I think this is bogus. I came from generations(grandpa, uncles, cousins) of proud--and stupid--womanizers and believe me, there weren't any nannies in my late grandpa's day and he still cheated on his wife and managed to father dozens of children from different women outside his marriage. Some in the family believed his serial infidelity drove my poor grandma to an early grave.

But anyway, I believe cheating on your spouse is the lowest of the low no matter who does it... having a nanny while young doesn't cut it because each of us have the power to choose between right and wrong. I saw firsthand the effects of womanizing (abandoned wives and kids, poverty etc.) and anecdotal though this is, I know nannies/caregivers weren't the cause.

My much loved but exasperatingly good-time loving grandpa, uncles, brother,cousins etc. just did not say "no"... and their families suffered for it. And for those Lotharios I'm related to who read this, I love you guys but saying "it runs in the family or "lahi kasi" doesn't cut it either.

*** photo by Getty

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So long, Panda.

you did good...

My mother just informed me that our dog Panda has died. She found him in his usual place near the doorway, lifeless. He was her faithful protector and friend for more than five years. Panda was my dog first though... My cousin Tox' wife Jenny gave him to me when he was a puppy because she was concerned that her newborn baby girl might get hurt since he was so rambunctious... he looked so adorable I immediately relented and took him home not thinking that I could not possibly take care of a puppy with my hectic hospital schedule.

So I asked my niece Girlie(who was about to leave for New Zealand)to take him home to my mother in Bicol... fooled by his cuteness, she readily agreed. Girlie would later tell me that he was such a pain in the 10-hour drive ( barking, crying, pooping), it was the worse trip she's ever had! Anyway, so Panda became my mother's dog that way. She's convinced that he's the epitome of an alpha dog--the other dogs, puppies and cats followed his lead. He chased away chickens and wannabe thieves from the farm and barked at anyone who got too close to our driveway.

My Mama is still baffled why he just suddenly died on her like that. But she was thankful to have had such a good, fiercely loyal companion... what she will miss the most was his gamboling around by her side in her backyard "farm". It's always sad to lose a much-loved pet... but such is life. We're all just here for a little while... so we should try to make each day count. Good Lord, I'm feeling melancholy...

*** pic courtesy of Girlie

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Happy New Year!

A Happy New Year to everyone... The past year has been a challenge but a new year brings new hope for the future. 2010 will bring trials I'm sure, but God is always good and will give us sufficient grace for every problem we may encounter.

New Year's day is also my mother's birthday so it's always been extra-special for us...Happy 71st Birthday, Ma! I pray God would grant you more joyful years and continuous good health...

It's my sister's birthday on January 3 so Happy Birthday big sis... I know you and the kids will have to leave for Canada soon but for now we're here together so let's party!

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Starting them young...

My sister works as a nursing clinical coordinator at a local university here and she asked me to take part in their annual gift-giving activity to the Oyango tribe in barrio Santa Teresita. They are going to give away some supplies so we bought rice noodles and canned goods. Some of our relatives also gave money so we could buy more stuff. Thanks guys!

This pictures show us repacking the goods so it would be ready for distribution. It's good to see my nephew and nieces are being taught to be socially responsible this early and are all willing to help. We're really looking forward to this...will keep you up to date and post about this later.

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Christmas Birthday Party

with Mama, Mariel, Maris, Katherine & Jian

Christmas day is my nephew Jian's birthday. This year's celebration was different in that instead of having a party for just close family and friends--all the neighborhood kids were invited. It must be tough for a newly minted 14-year-old to have a children's party on his birthday but he was persuaded to share his blessings this Christmas to kids who needed it.

trying to hit pottery full of candies

There must be more than 50 children who attended and it was a lot of fun. Isn't it funny how being around children makes you have perspective about things? Their sheer joy in the little things is a wonder to behold. Sometimes as adults we fail to appreciate the importance of the simple things.

digging in

Kids don't have that problem. Watching them as they participated in games, danced with abandon, sang karaoke uncaring how they sounded to people listening--was a real treat. A reminder that there was a time that I wasn't too cautious or jaded...ah the good times.

Jian giving away prizes

The celebration went on all afternoon and night...there were people still coming at 9 pm and luckily the food was enough for everybody. Everyone was tired at the end of the day--but the kids (young and old) had fun--so mission accomplished.

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Going Home for Christmas...

Alex' Canadian-born daughter Aliyah

My bags are packed for my trip home...I travel light every time I go back to the province knowing my older sister Marisa (it's official, I've mentioned all my sisters in this blog, LOL) would gladly lend me the stuff I needed. The Christmas break has always been special considering that's the only time I get to see my family--at least the family I have left in the Philippines--my mother, my sister and her 3 children.

Vic with his kids Alyssa, Emman and Girlie

There's 6 siblings in the family and Marisa and I are the only ones left in the country. My eldest brother Vic is living in New Zealand, my other older brother Alex lives in Canada, eldest sister Mayet is in Italy, Anne is in Australia...add to that my aunts and uncles and cousins in Switzerland, Germany, the US, the Middle East etc. It's really sad to think that we really haven't taken a complete family picture in more than 10 years.

Anne being goofy in Melbourne

It might sound odd to the readers of this blog in Western countries--but this is the situation of most families in the Philippines. Opportunities are few and far between that after college, the majority of those who can leave to work in other countries, do so. My generation owes a debt to those who left and sent their hard-earned money back to support our education.

Mayet in Milan

In my family, the trailblazer is my mother's sister Auntie Ester when she left to work in Germany in the early 60's--she helped her younger siblings finish school then their turn came and in due course aided us to finish school and find opportunities (I'm talking to you Auntie Alice, Fannie and Uncle Mar). I have heard of horror stories about families getting splintered by long separations but we have remained close against all odds, thank God.

my cousins with uncle Mar & aunts Fannie and Alice

Our government calls overseas Filipinos 'new heroes' due to their multi-billion dollar remittances that keep the country afloat in hard times. We even narrowly avoided recession this year because even if the economy is bad in the country where they work--Filipinos still sent billions home. This is all well and good but I just wish that in the near future, the Philippines won't have to 'export' its people to keep it solvent. That Filipinos would have opportunities right here in this beautiful country. It's Christmas, so I'm allowed to wish for the seemingly impossible, right?

Marisa's husband freezing in Alberta

I started this post not expecting to touch on anything heavy, but Christmas is a weird time... shopping for stuff is fun but there's really no better Christmas than spending it with people you grew up with...people who's been there for you in good times and bad...people who loves you no matter what. So to my brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, cousins galore--the people who matter the most to me--I just want to let you know you are deeply missed this Christmas and I hope to see you again soon.

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Tiger Woods in action

I finally got my sister's pictures from the JBWere Masters golf tournament in Melbourne. Anne and her BFF Cheryl saw Tiger Woods win there ( which made me turn green with envy ). So being the annoying little sister, I begged and badgered to make sure she took pictures for me and she came through! Let's take a break from the Tiger cheating scandal and look at these and remember that Tiger Woods became famous because of his golf prowess. Whatever personal troubles he's going through right now, it does not take away from the fact that he is the best golfer ever.

Tiger mulling his shot

Are you spitting on your hand, mister?

must be tough having people take photos of your behind...

watching your every move...

or just staring expectantly at you...

that toy tiger driver cover is "Frank", he models too

thanks, sis!

hi there, BFF Cheryl

"Frank" the driver head cover in commercials with Tiger Woods:

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God keep you safe, Nonoy.

I've been following the media reports on the Maguindanao massacre online when I clicked on another story and a familiar name jumped at me Lt. Jimrhic Obias. He is my cousin's son, who is a nephew to me really. At first I thought there must be some mistake. He'd been hurt 11 months ago in an ambush, shot in the left arm and chest and almost didn't make it. He'd had a difficult recovery because his median nerve was injured so he couldnt oppose or flex his thumbs even after months of physical therapy. He went back to his unit 4 months ago - his family expecting he'd just sit on a desk doing office work. This doesn't read like a desk job to me.

Dumaguete City - A Philippine Army soldier was wounded when a small band of suspected New People's Army rebels opened fire on a military truck at about 8 a.m. yesterday along the national highway in Guihulngan, Negros Oriental.

A seven-member team from the Guihulngan-based 11th Infantry Battalion of the Army, led by Lt. Jimrhic Obias, was on board a KIA KM-450 military truck en route to Bacolod City in Negros Occidental, when some 10 perceived NPA rebels fired at them along the national highway at the boundary of Guihulngan and Vallehermoso towns.

Lt. Col. Franco Nemesio Gacal, commanding officer of the 11 th IB, identified the wounded as Private First Class Ariel Pangantihon, who was hit on his right arm.

Initial police investigation showed that during the ambush, the soldiers were able to fire back at the rebels as the truck they were riding continued traversing the national highway, Guihulngan police chief, Sr. Insp. Petronelli Gracia, said.

Gracia said the soldiers were fired upon twice, first in Barangay Hibaiyo in Guihulngan and a few minutes later at the boundary of Vallehermoso, about five to six hours ride north of Dumaguete City .

I could not for the life of me understand why he's being shot at again but if the army thinks he is fit now to lead his team, he must be physically up to it right? I tried to call him and when he did not pick up, I texted him about his safe 'office work'. He answered right back asking me not to tell his Mama and the rest of the family because he told them nothing, obviously. That is typical of him, when he got hurt before Christmas last year he did not tell his parents until he was out of the woods weeks later. He did not want us to worry about this latest skirmish, he is fine, he'll be careful... So I didn't nag too much though I couldn't help but try to plead with him to find another job. He could easily get one in the private sector, this is a very smart kid after all.

couldn't do the 'v' sign with big sis and auntie

But I remember too that when he was in his junior year taking up engineering at the University of the Philippines, he decided to enroll at the Philippine Military Academy much to his parents' dismay. He told me it had always been his dream to serve his country this way, he tried to make it work at the UP but the call of military service is stronger. He did very well at the PMA graduating with honors and given various awards for leadership. We might not be too excited about his chosen path (cannon fodder?!) but we are surely proud of him.

with his sisters and brother at the army hospital

He is a hero, living in a country that much too often ignores its heroes. When he was in the army hospital, we were shocked at the conditions there ( the bathroom's clogged, water supply unreliable). He had to buy his own medicines because the pharmacy did not have it in stock. That is why I marvel at his dedication. No matter the difficulties he faced the past year--with a slightly atrophied left hand and nerve injury pain that must still keep him up at night. He's still shooting back at rebel terrorists, still fighting. He and soldiers like him might save this country yet. We are blessed.

Update 2012: Jim is doing great. He got married and now has the most adorable baby girl. :)

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